I don’t need to create music for music to exist that expresses how I feel
I don’t need to write words for words to exist that express how I feel
I don’t need to write jokes to express truths. I can listen to other people speak truth for me.
Other people can do all of that for me. People that have practiced. For a long time. People talented. Gifted. I don’t need to do it myself.
I give up trying to be happy. I’m just going to be sad. I’ve tried too long to be happy.
I give up trying to get over her. It’s too painful to try and move on. I’d rather die alone than let go.
If I make her unhappy, I’d rather not be with her. Because I’d rather she be happy.
I don’t really know how to be happy.
I don’t really know what to do.
Best I can do is wait. Keep my head down. Maybe unplug for a little bit.
Accept that this is my fate. Accept that I’m going to be sad, for who knows how long.